Children with
problems are
those we harm,
by distorting
their character,
and poisoning
their feelings.
This is what the
Spirit Emmanuel
teaches us in
Chapter IV of
the book "Love
Laws".
"No one
escapes the law
of reincarnation.
(...)
And, no matter
what are our
obstacles in the
family, we must
become aware
that all the
moral building
of the Kingdom
of God starts in
the invisible
foundations of
the struggle at
home".11
Before marriage,
there is a
sublime
connection
between bride
and groom.
Conversation is
charming, packed
in the melody of
dreams.
After the
wedding, in many
cases, (...)
"There is no
reciprocal
concessions, no
tolerance and
sometimes not
even friendship.
And the luminous
beauty of love
perishes, when
husband and wife
let go
friendship and
the pleasure of
talking to each
other".
"(...) very few
are aware that
home is an
essentially
divine
institution and
that one should
live within its
doors, with all
your heart and
with all your
soul".12
How to interpret
these changes?
When we manage
to live together
at home, that is
when the
obligations of
the past appear.
Many domestic
difficulties are
brought from
other lives.
In our family we
are in contact
again with those
we liked in
previous lives,
or those we do
not like, with
the purpose of
adjustment and
readjustment.
DIVORCE
"(...) A man
will leave
father and
mother and be
joined to his
wife, and they
become one flesh
(...) So they
are no longer
two, but one
flesh.
Therefore, what
God has joined,
let not man
separate".
Matthew 19: 5-6.
However, Jesus
accepted the
divorce if
caused by
adultery
(Matthew 19: 9).
"Divorce is a
human law that
is intended to
separate legally
what is already,
in fact,
separated. It is
not contrary to
God's law, since
it only amends
what men did and
is only
applicable in
cases that do
not take into
account the law
of God". 13
It is allowed as
a last resort,
to avoid greater
harm.
But the Spirits
call our
attention to the
fact that we are
responsible for
our marriage,
according to
Jesus' advice to
Joan of Chusa,
above, to whom
He recommended
resignation, to
maintain her
marriage:
"As for the
divorce (...) in
our opinion it
should not be
made easy or
encouraged among
men, because
there is no
marriage on this
Earth, legalized
or not, without
strong ties on
the principle of
responsibility
assumed by both
partners".14
MARRIAGE IN THE
BIBLE
"He who finds a
wife finds a
good thing, and
is blessed by
the Lord".
Proverbs 18:22.
"Husbands should
love their wives
as their own
bodies. He who
loves his wife,
loves himself".
Paul, Eph, 5:28.
MARRIAGE AND
LOVE
"All that comes
from God is
immutable. All
that is work of
man is subject
to change.
(...) in a
marriage,
besides the
divine material
Law, common to
all living
beings, there
is another
divine law,
unchangeable as
the Laws of God,
exclusively
moral: the Law
of Love. God
wanted human
beings to come
together not
only by the
bonds of the
flesh, but also
of the soul, so
that the mutual
affection of the
spouses should
be transmitted
to the children,
and they were
two, not one, to
love them, to
care for them
and to make them
progress. Is the
law of love
taken into
account under
ordinary
conditions of
marriage? Not at
all. It does not
take into
account the
affection of two
beings who are
attracted to
each other by
reciprocal
feelings, since,
in most cases,
this affection
is broken. What
is sought is not
the satisfaction
of the heart,
but the pride,
vanity, greed,
in a word, of
all material
interests.
(...)
When God said,
"You will not be
but one flesh",
and when Jesus
said, "Do not
separate what
God has joined
together", these
words must be
understood with
reference to the
union according
to the immutable
law of God, and
not according to
the changing law
of men". 15
CONCLUSION
Couples who love
each other
develop their
own language:
gestures,
glances, smiles
and winks are
worth speeches.
They translate
thoughts that
words cannot
express. This
gives them joy
and peace. Their
hearts are
connected -
which favors the
serene and
constant
dialogue,
exposing,
clearly, their
own feelings.
Those, who do
not love each
other, live in
growing tension,
with beatings
and screams -
which shows that
their hearts are
far apart,
although
physically
close. This
fills their
lives with
sadness and
unhappiness.
The first soften
the pain in
their path, and
build happiness
in this world.
The last
aggravate the
natural
difficulties of
life.
In the home, it
is up to the
couple to give
children love,
education,
support and
examples.
They ought to
devote
themselves to
the study of the
Gospel, to teach
them to pray and
to love God.
We do not
understand, yet,
on Earth, the
importance of
sincere prayer,
in all
circumstances,
but it assumes
extraordinary
value within the
four walls of a
home!
Spouses grow
when there is
real commitment
from one to the
other and with
the sacred tasks
that they
embrace in their
home, if they
invest in the
relationship,
make mutual
concessions, if
they do not hold
grievances, nor
cultivate
feelings of
revenge, if they
are friendly,
and show
fellowship to
share joys,
sorrows, dreams
and
accomplishments,
express
admiration and
mutual support,
and if they
praise each
other when alone
or in public.
And the conjugal
union fulfills
its purpose -
which is the
growth of both
and of those
around them -
when they sit
down face to
face and look
into each
other's eyes.
Marriage, after
all, is a
long-term chat.
Life together
requires
resignation on
both sides. In
any quarrel,
someone must
take the first
step and break
the ice.
It requires
permanent
exercise of
understanding,
donation, mutual
respect of
individuality,
to the other's
tendencies,
tastes and
habits, loyalty,
patience, and
above all, the
performance of
duties, however
small.
To support the
other, so that
he/her can
expand his/her
potential, and
talents,
developing
self-esteem,
brings the
couple together.
In marriage the
constant
exercise of
love, affection,
tenderness,
makes marriage
pleasant and
develops the
spiritual
communion.
Love must be
greater than the
difficulties.
Magical
expressions in
favor of
harmony: I am
wrong, you are
right, please
forgive me, I
was rude, I
promise that I
will change my
behavior.
How about
starting today
using these
expressions for
peace at home?
These are
factors that
create a cozy
atmosphere and
transform houses
in homes.
References:
1. DIAS DA
SILVA, MA.
The one who
loves does not
fall ill.
5th ed. Sao
Paulo: Best
Seller
Publisher, 1994.
p. 283.
2. XAVIER, F.
Candido. The
Good News.
By the Spirit
Humberto de
Campos.
13th ed. Rio de
Janeiro: FEB,
1979. Chapter
15, pages
99-104.
3. McGarey,
Gladys y
William.
Revelaciones de
Edgar Cayce
sobre el amor y
la familia.
Madrid:
EDITORIAL EDAF,
S. A., 1989.
Chapter 16, p..
245. Free
translation of
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4. XAVIER,
Francisco C.
The Comforter.
By the Spirit
Emmanuel. 7th
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Rio de Janeiro:
FEB.1977. Q.
179.
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Francisco C.
Our Home.
By the Spirit
Andre Luiz. 25th
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1982. Chapter
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Francisco C.
Life and Sex.
By the Spirit
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6th edition Rio
de Janeiro: FEB,
1982.
P. 60.
7. Kardec,
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Evandro Bezerra
Noleto. 1st
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Commemorating
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Rio de Janeiro:
FEB, 2006. Q.
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939,
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Allan. The
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Translation:
Evandro Bezerra
Noleto. 2nd ed.
Rio de Janeiro:
FEB, 2013.
Chapter V, item
4.
9. XAVIER,
Francisco C.
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(Divine) Light
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Rio de Janeiro:
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Chapter 49, page
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Francisco C.
Our Home.
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13. Kardec,
Allan. The
Gospel According
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Translation:
Evandro Bezerra
Noleto. 2nd ed.
Rio de Janeiro:
FEB, 2013.
Chapter 22, item
5.
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Francisco C.
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15. Kardec,
Allan. The
Gospel According
to Spiritism.
Translation:
Evandro Bezerra
Noleto. 2nd ed.
Rio de Janeiro:
FEB, 2013.
Chapter 22,
items 2 and 3.