The hand that hits is the
same that cherishes
 

While analyzing the recurrent idea that educating children is a very difficult task months ago, a well-known psychologist made an opportune warning regarding the importance of affection and love in the task of educating children and constructing a home where a child can turn into an adult who acts and lives worthily.

The psychologist, citing that many parents lose their control and use violence when they face the child’s stubbornness and mischief, warned that, among other things, educating children is to turn wild impulses into aptitude to affection. “When you lose your patience, the best thing to do is to leave and let your partner take over the control”, he says.

This thesis has been proposed by several therapists based on the researches, proofing that we shouldn’t hit a child not even with a flower. Parents who try to domesticate instead of educating think that their method is efficient, but the future consequences show them the contrary, as soon as they find out that the problems originated by their attitudes are bigger than the action that has motivated the punishment, whatever is physical or moral.

In essence, this posture adopted by modern psychologists isn’t different from what Spiritism teaches us. From a Spiritist perspective, says J. Herculano Pires, education doesn’t consist of integrating new genarations into the society and culture of their epoch only, but it’s also the process of developing capabilities while experiencing a new existence, aiming the transcedental future.

Every person brings with himself, in each passage through the planet, the results of his previous development from prior existences, which start appearing since the first year of life in his trends and in the set of manifestations of his personality. It’s up to the parents and educators to observe such traces and guide the adjustments, correcting the deficiencies and excesses when possible.

A child isn’t a new individual, but a being who has reincarnated, someone who has returned to earthly existence after many passages through here, therefore, bringing a vast range of positive and negative experiences deep in his mind. So, a child needs someone to support, guide, protect and educate him. But one won’t educate anybody for a reason other than love because, using Herculano’s words, only love educates, only tenderness makes souls grown up in goodness.

The hand that hurts is the very same that lulls, cares, cherishes but, in sound conscience, it shouldn’t be an instrument of aggression.