|
Kennedy Gomes
Marins (photo)
is a
psychologist
from the city of
Sertãozinho, in
the state of São
Paulo. He is a
member of the
local Spiritist
Centre – Deus e
Caridade – and
of a group that
works with
alcoholics and
drug addicts,
known as GRAAUS.
He is also a
Spiritist public
speaker and the
coordinator of
several study
groups. His
professional
experience adds
an interesting
perspective to
his profound
knowledge of
Spiritism, as it
will become
evident in the
following
interview:
|
|
As a trained
psychologist
with long
clinical
experience, what
would you say is
the main reason
why people come
looking for
treatment, for
therapies? |
Psychotherapy is
a powerful tool
to help us face
the challenges
in our lives,
which manifest
in various ways,
in many
different
situations.
People look for
psychotherapy
for a number of
reasons that
afflict human
beings, such as
depression,
fears,
insecurity,
phobias,
anxiety,
personal
conflicts,
marital and
family problems,
bereavement,
problems in
social and group
relationships
and many others.
Many also come
for
psychotherapy as
preventive
measure, as a
way of achieving
internal growth
and
self-knowledge.
The fact that so
many people live
now so far from
God and immersed
in a
materialistic
society is, in
your view, an
important factor
in their low
self-esteem?
Absolutely, as
those who look
for realisation
in material
values, in what
is in fact an
illusion, will
inevitably get
frustrated and
disappointed.
That will bring
about a feeling
of profound
anguish.
Self-esteem and
self-love are
the outcome of
being in harmony
with our
essence, and we
are all the
children of God.
When we move
away from the
real aims in
life and begin
living simply as
material bodies,
all we collect
is
disappointments.
But when we live
as spiritual
beings, we will
have found the
real aims in
life and will
live happier and
with more
energy.
The setbacks in
life lead to
different
reactions and
injuries in each
person. Is there
a recipe to
manage the
events of our
lives in a more
balanced
manner?
People suffer
with the meaning
it attaches to
what goes on
with them, not
with what really
goes on with
them. Hence, two
people can go
through the same
adversity and
have very
different
reactions,
according to
their
interpretation
of the facts.
Some see in the
setbacks an
opportunity to
learn and
progress,
transforming
their pain into
positive changes
in their lives.
My grandmother
used to say that
some setbacks
happened for a
good reason. I
never forget
grandma Meéca’s
recipe to manage
the adversities
of live in a
balanced and
measured way.
Many people feel
paralysed by
fear and
shyness, which
are a result of
a number of
factors. What is
your advice to
overcome those
feelings?
Fear is a
natural feeling
and should be
part of the
natural, healthy
emotions of
every human
being. But one
should make a
distinction
between healthy
fear and
pathological
fear. The former
protects us from
the dangers of
life and comes
from the
instinct of
self-preservation.
But fear becomes
pathological
when the person
produces a
distorted and
unreal
interpretation
of a situation
or an object.
Shyness comes
generally from a
feeling of deep
internal
insecurity. The
shy person needs
to reassess how
they see
themselves. Shy
people normally
believe they are
worthless and
incapable. But
we are all
capable. We have
indeed our
problems and
challenges, but
we also have
immense
potential that
can be
developed. Why
focus only on
the negative
side?
Many problems
come from
grudges, from
hurt feelings
and even
jealousy and
envy. As a
psychologist, do
you have many
cases dealing
with those
emotions? Are
they
particularly
difficult?
As the Spiritist
Doctrine
teaches, the
biggest wound in
humankind is
pride and
selfishness.
From those
feelings come
all the problems
you mentioned.
We are still
ignorant
spirits, we are
students lacking
discipline, who
haven’t yet been
able to learn
the Law of Love,
which was so
well taught and
exemplified by
Jesus. Yes,
there are many
cases dealing
with those
issues. Whether
they are the
most
challenging?
Let’s direct our
thoughts to our
Master Jesus,
who has been
teaching us for
2011 years and
remember that we
are still
stubborn enough
not to learn or
practice his
lessons.
How big is the
family
background in
the formation of
the personality,
its neurosis,
fears and other
characteristics?
Family is the
big school where
our feelings are
formed. Through
the coexistence
and the examples
observed,
children begin
registering
their first
impressions of
life and forming
their
personality.
Their
experiences
within the
family ambience
will play a very
important role
in the formation
of their psyche,
contributing
either for a
positive make up
or an unbalanced
personality.
Fortunately
parents have
nowadays better
conditions to
provide their
children with a
positive
environment, so
that they can
learn from their
examples.
Parents are more
aware of their
responsibility
and they have at
their hands
these days a
huge amount of
resources to
help their
children build a
healthy and
balanced
psychological
profile, in tune
with the true
values of Good.
What is the link
between
Psychology and
Spirtism?
Psychology is
the science of
the soul. It
deals with human
behaviour, the
mental processes
and their
interaction.
Spiritism, in
the words of
Allan Kardec, is
the science that
deals with the
nature, origin
and destiny of
the Spirits, as
well as their
relations with
the material
world. The very
definitions of
Psychology and
Spiritism make
it clear that
there is a great
deal in common
between these
two fields of
science.
How can that
link you mention
help us?
There is no
doubt it can
help us. Science
and religion
never really got
along well, as
there was no
reason in faith
and they carried
on one without
the other. The
gap between
science and
religion is
being filled by
the knowledge of
the mechanisms
of the Spiritual
Universe and its
relations with
the material
world. Once
those mechanisms
are
scientifically
proven, a new
light will shine
on human
knowledge. Those
studies are
being carried
out by eminent
scientists in
the best
universities in
Brazil and
abroad.
Spiritism can
play a very
important role
to development
of Psychology
and other fields
of science, as
it sums up human
knowledge. It
can also be
illuminated by
other sciences.
But one thing
must be said,
and I don’t mean
it badly: we
can’t make a
psychology
practice out of
a Spiritist
Centre and
vice-versa.
What is the
assessment you
make of the
audience in your
Spiritist
lectures and
speeches?
I think there is
a great demand
for serious and
in-depth studies
of the Doctrine.
We, as Spirist
speakers, should
go deeper in our
debates, moving
away from many
superficial
issues and the
traditional
public speaking
model, which in
many cases works
only on our
egos. We have
huge
responsibility,
we are committed
to disseminating
the knowledge of
Spiritism, but
most of all we
must lead by
example and live
what we teach.
What else would
you like to
add?
It comes to my
mind now the
beginning of the
beautiful song
by the Spiritist
musician Moacyr
Camargo, titled
Louis
Armstrong:
“I believe
That the world
will be
Much better than
it is
If we fill our
souls with
flowers
And become
nothing but
flower
fragrances
Without the
thorns that have
hurt so much.
Ahead, my
friends, we will
triumph in Love
and Good! Let’s
live like
spiritual beings
in a bodily
experience, not
like bodies in a
spiritual
experience.”
May God always
bless us. My
fraternal
embrace to all
of you.